Weight Loss Surgery Update 12/16/08

Today when I got into work I had an e-mail from Chicago… it was them sending me copies of the letters they sent my Family Doctor and Insurance company… it was a little odd because I was reading this paper where they were talking about me to someone else… just really impersonal ( I felt like a lab rat)… anyway here is there reasons that they gave for me having the surgery….

“The patient's current medical co-morbidities associated with morbid obesity (ICD-9 code 278.01) include diabetes mellitus (250.40), hypertension (401.1), hyperlipidemia (272.4), and possible sleep apnea (780.51).”

Its really weird, cause I know that the doctor has me on like four different medications and two of them I take twice a day… but until I read about me from a third party stand point I don’t think it really ever sunk in… something else… the one they are requesting is the “laparoscopic duodenal switch” which is the one where they actually go in and remove (not staple) part of your stomach… it is the most extreme, but it gives the most “permanent” results. According to the letter the hospital stay will be 2-3 days.. and then there will be 6 follow up visits… that’s all I know for now.

Christmas Carols

Sorry I haven’t been on here in a while... there is just a lot of stuff going on my my mind right now and I can’t really talk about it... but I will soon enough. Last night we went caroling… I really like to sing (even if it hurts the ears of others) so it was fun. We caroled at someone’s house that we knew… but it got me to thinking it would be fun to be able to just go caroling… walking around singing Christmas songs… but in today’s society I don’t think it would work… what I picture is a group of carolers singing in front of someone’s house and then the police coming and getting them for solicitation of God or something… beating them down with there sticks… dragging them away… oh wait a minute… I think I just went into the videos you see of people fighting for there freedom. But then aren’t we? It’s a sad state this country is in when someone is made to feel like they should be ashamed because they choose to live the way God asked them to!!!! That’s not the way it should be at all… in fact the people that choose not to live for God are the ones who should be ashamed… Now they even go so far as taking CHRISTmas, the celebration of HIS birth, and take HIM out of it… its ridiculous!!! X-mas... seriously? What a joke… it’s HIS Holiday… we are His creation… HIS not ours… if you are alive today it’s because HE gave you the breath of life…. Not because some gorillas got frisky a long time ago. How much is God really on anyone’s mind right now… seriously? How many people will truly celebrate God and the sacrifice he made? How many people will think about the fact that about 2000 years ago a baby was born in a stable… not a hospital not a house, but a stable… because no one had any room for him, and that baby was God almighty… the living God… no body had room for him then and nobody seems to have room for him now… sad. I might sound over the top to you, and if I do that’s fine. Some people like to show there patriotism… to show respect to the men giving there life so we can have our freedom. I choose to Respect the fact that my God came down from his thrown and became flesh so he could give his life so I could have my salvation.

Little Star

The other day I got to hear a beautiful sound… it was my son playing Twinkle Twinkle Little Star. Did he mess up? A couple times. Did he keep tempo? Not really. Was it still Awesome to see my son be able to play a song, not by memory but by reading the music? Yes!!!!! And the look on his face when he finished said it all, He was smiling from ear to ear glowing… And all he said when he was done was “I did it all the way through”… I still think it’s awesome!!!! You know it shows me something (I know “here he goes”) It wasn’t easy for Corbyn to do, but it got easier… he didn’t do it completely perfect… but he did it…. You know how he did it? He followed the Book that showed him what to do and he listened to what his Teacher had told him… two key factors… if we would apply that to our walk with God I think it would make things a lot easier… yeah we might mess up once in a while… but the great thing is that, just like Corbyn’s piano Book, the word doesn’t change… we can go back and do it right!!!! But the only way to master it is to not give up… to keep our eyes on the mark and one day we will realize… Hey “I did it all the way through “!!!!

Events from the weekend

Stephanie and I went to that Brandon Heath Concert on Saturday… It was pretty good… I like his voice but I have to admit my favorite songs of his are the ones they play on the radio… but that’s o.k.… it was still fun. There was a guy sitting right in front of us that proposed to his Girlfriend… it was pretty cool, if I was the “sensitive type” I would go into more detail on this but I won’t sorry J and then on the way home there was the snow… oh so much snow… and the only thing I dislike more than driving in snow is riding with someone else driving in snow so I decided to go ahead and drive…. Not a shining moment in my life!!!! I also found out that the brother of a childhood friend of mine passed away… I will be going to his viewing today over lunch… he was only 32… its really weird in the last couple weeks I have known two people under 35 pass away. It just goes to show that we are not guaranteed tomorrow to “make things right “. Last night was my night to preach/teach/whatever it is I do, and that came up a little bit, so I’m not going to go on and on about it… but I will say this… look at your life… really look at your life and what you’ve chosen to do with it… if you were to die today would you be o.k.… would you really be o.k.? its something I ask myself all the time, am I doing what I should… there is this assumption that just being a good person will get you to heaven… the bible says “And if the righteous scarcely be saved, where shall the ungodly and the sinner appear?” (1peter 4:18)… it also says “Because strait is the gate, and narrow is the way, which leaded unto life, and few there be that find it.” (Mathew 7:14)… one other thought and then I am done… have you ever thought about the fact that in the popular Story about Noah and the ark that God only saved 8 people out of the whole world… (Noah, his wife, his three sons and there wives) He saved those that listened to his voice…

Weight Loss Surgery Update

To those who are wondering about the “Bariatric Surgery” with me… I talked to June (my coordinator) and she said that I have been accepted into the program…. They are now going to submit to the Insurance (which can take 30 to 90 days) and I have some things I have to do before hand… those things being my family Dr. has to send them some more of my history and I have to have a sleep study (check me for sleep apnea). And before I have surgery I need to meet with Dr. Alverti (the surgeon) at this point, if the insurance agrees I’m looking at March time frame for the surgery… It just keeps getting more and more real… o.k. that’s that!

Choices

I feel like my mind is all jumbled full of things right now… and trying to pull one of the ideas to put on paper is like trying to choose what to have for supper in a food court!!!! So I figure I’m just going to start righting and see what happens… so I apologize in advance if today’s post is “confusing”. During this time of year I am full of appreciation that God was willing to give his life for me… I know most people think of it at Easter… but this is the celebration of his birth… to think our god come down to earth, to grow up and be loved by his parents to go through a normal life… and to think of his family… a Jewish family… they would have known what the future held for this child… Isaiah had written about it… Only a parent knows the joy that runs through you the first time you hold your baby… knowing that God has given you this gift… how bittersweet it must have been for her to look down and know that God had entrusted her with a gift for the whole world… and to know that the little baby she held in her arms, she nursed, she cared for… would one day be the lamb of God… I can’t imagine… and what do we do with that gift? Does God think that the price he paid is truly understood by those he paid if for? Wednesday night when we got home I was exhausted… and had already told my pastor that I didn’t know if I would be there because I didn’t know when I would get home… so he wasn’t expecting me. Anyway I took a nap and when it came time to get up and get ready for church the thought passed my mind… “They aren’t expecting you, just stay home and get rest, you’re drained, God will understand”. And then my perspective changed… I pictured my god beaten beyond recognition… and still having to walk up Calvary… he kept going… he loved me enough to push through the agony and continue his journey. I went to church that night… but I went ashamed that I had ever even considered not going an option. Some might read this and think “nothing would have happened if you would have just stayed home and got rest”… I’ll be praying for you… because my biggest fear is what might not happen if I don’t give serving God my all. A saint of God used to say that we have a Heaven to gain and a Hell to shun, I think that happens one decision at a time.

Grandpa Ray

Yesterday morning I found out that my Great Grandfather past away… so I will be going to his viewing/funeral tomorrow and Wednesday… its really odd because on Saturday when we were at my Wife’s extended families Christmas her grandfather was talking about everything happening for a reason in our life… and I am a firm believer in this… I feel like we have been surrounded by death recently… but to everything there is a season… and you know things die out in the fall… but the spring brings new life… and that is what I keep telling myself… new life is on the way!!!!! There is an old song and I’m not sure what the name is but it says

Precious Lord, take my hand,
Lead me on, let me stand,
I am tired, I am weak, I am worn;
Through the storm, through the night,
Lead me on to the light:
When my way grows drear,
Precious Lord, linger near,
When my life is almost gone,
Hear my cry, hear my call,
Hold my hand lest I fall:
Refrain
When the darkness appears
And the night draws near,
And the day is past and gone,

I won't lie, I feel worn thin... but I know that the Lord will never put more on me than I can bare... and I know that I am not going through this alone... I know that God is my strong tower... and I know that he is my strength... I can look back at the bible... and those stories in there... those people went through some serious situations... but God was with them... and I know he's with me too.

HAPPY THANKSGIVING

I won’t be back until Monday… So I just wanted to Wish everyone “Happy Thanksgiving”…. I pray that you all have a wonderful day!!!!! Lord Willing I’ll post something on Monday!!!!

Season of Change

Ecclesiastes 3
1 To every thing there is a season, and a time to every purpose under the heaven:
2 A time to be born, and a time to die; a time to plant, and a time to pluck up that which is
planted;
3 A time to kill, and a time to heal; a time to break down, and a time to build up;
4 A time to weep, and a time to laugh; a time to mourn, and a time to dance;
5 A time to cast away stones, and a time to gather stones together; a time to embrace, and a
time to refrain from embracing;
6 A time to get, and a time to lose; a time to keep, and a time to cast away;
7 A time to rend, and a time to sew; a time to keep silence, and a time to speak;
8 A time to love, and a time to hate; a time of war, and a time of peace.

Starting last week we had a lot of events in our life. First we lost someone that had gone to church for a long time… he was older and had battled cancer for ten years… Then I found out that a cousin of mine passed away in his sleep, he was only 30 years old and had three children ( 8, 7, and three months) he had a heart transplant when he was younger and that gave him I think close to 20 more years… these are both sad situations.. And they both hurt… but everything has a season… And there is a reason for all things in God’s perfect plan… after all the loss it was a true blessing when Sunday Morning some close friends of ours had their third child… and it made me think of the scriptures at the beginning of this blog… Sometimes I think we can get so caught up in being bitter over things we feel like we “lose” that we forget to appreciate the things we have, the trick is to cherish what you have while you have it, that way if its season with you ends before you expect you will have no regrets over the things you wish you would have done. I saw an e-mail about not waiting, and living every day like it was your last… If today was my last day first I would want to know that I had done all I know to do to make sure I’m saved… because when this life ends, eternity is what we have waiting. Second I would want all of my friends, Family, In-laws!!!, and Church family to know that I love them… of course I would want to know my wife and son were taken care of, but I already know that as long as they serve God they WILL be o.k.… anyway, I’m done for now… just try to remember that none of us are promised another breath… 30 years is only 2 years older than me… Make sure that the things you deem important are in check.

Who's teaching who?

Last night was my sons first piano lesson… all that really happened was she went over some very basic stuff with him but it was still quite a sight to see for me… while he was randomly hitting the keys I was seeing what he could one day be… Isn’t if funny how we can learn so much from our kids. Its true that we teach them how to do a lot but they are gifts to us… and I see why, they remind us of the little things in life that sometimes get lost in the hustle and bustle of things… And if we allow them too they show us a whole new way to look at situations… from an innocent perspective. But anyway last night I was thinking about it watching him play and seeing what he could be… I think that must have been what God saw when he looked down on me… because I definitely wasn’t a “saintly” person… but he must have seen what I could become… not that I’m saying I’m perfect, because I’m not… although it would be nice if I were!!!! Well anyway, I’m going to get off here… just try not to be too hard on yourself, do your best that’s what is expected…. When my son started coloring I wanted him to always stay in the lines… and he told me that his teacher said he needed to try to stay in the lines but it was o.k. if he got out once in a while… that is so true… we need to constantly work at staying in the lines.. If we mess up that doesn’t mean to give up it just means we should realize what we were doing (going to fast, losing focus, etc.) fix it and continue on.

For those we love

o.k.…. I don’t know who keeps track of my blog… I know that it says that I’ve had 35 visitors, but I also know that if someone stops in one time then that counts as a visitor… so I really have no idea… but if you do I have a challenge for you…. Today you should do something nice for no reason for someone you care about… if you have kids ask them what they want to do… or surprise them with hot chocolate and talk, if its your husband/wife maybe you could just write them a letter telling them that you do love them and are thankful that they are there for you to spend time with… maybe its your waitress and you want to leave her a tip more than usual… or take a friend out to lunch, or call your Mom, Dad, Grandma, Grandpa, Aunt, Uncle, Son, Daughter, Close friend… just to let them know that you wanted to remind them someone does care about them… these are just ideas, you get the gist of it…. The bible says “Therefore all things whatsoever ye would that men should do to you, do ye even so to them: for this is the law and the prophets. “ (Mathew 7:12) but remember it’s a nice gesture for no reason, you might not get a response from them… but remember you are doing it because you love them, not because you want something in return… find joy in the fact that you know that they know you care. And trust me, even if they don’t act like it, you will be making their day a little brighter.

So here is what I’m going to do in front of the whole world! (definately out of my comfort zone)

This is to my wife…. I love you with all my heart, And despite how I know you feel at times I would not change the person that you are. No I don’t feel that your perfect, but I do think you are right for me. Your “quirkiness” is part of your charm for me, when I point it out it isn’t because I want you to change it it’s because I think it’s cute. So I guess what I’m saying is if I could rewind to that day that I met you at Stephanie’s door, I wouldn’t even think about refusing to open it… you are one of the best things in my life. Even if I do a lousy job of showing it!!!! Again I love you more than you will ever know.

Give Thanks

All day I have been trying to think about what to write in my blog today… and to be honest I just keep having a scripture run through my mind so I’m going to quote it.

1 Thessalonians 5:18
In every thing give thanks: for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus concerning you.

Today is short and sweet, but its what I feel… just remember, things might not always make sense to us. But if we allow God to have his way in our life, we will get what is best for us.

My Rock

I don’t know how many of you have ever heard the song “I go to the Rock” but if you haven’t you should. Even if you don’t listen to “gospel” music… that song has been heavy on my heart since yesterday morning, and its still playing through my head… here are the words:

Where can I turnWhen there's no one else I can tun to
Whom I gonna talk toWhen nobody wants to listen?
Whom I gonna lean on
When there's no foundation stable
I go to the rock I know that's able
I go to the rock

Chorus
I go to the rock of my salvation
I go to the stone that the builders rejected
I run to the mountain and the mountain stands by me
The earth all around me is sinkin sand
On Christ the solid rock I stand
When I need a shelter
When I need a friend
I go to the rock

Where can I hideTill the storms have all passed over
Where I'm gonna run to
When those winds of sorrow threaten
Is there a refuge
In those times of great tribulation
When my soul needs a consolation
I go to the rock

Anyone that is serving God knows EXACTLY what they are talking about in this song… There are times that we find that even those that we know love us let us down… often times without realizing it… but in Jesus Christ we have a solution… I heard something once and it has stuck with me and given me strength many times so I’m going to share it with you now. “Instead of always telling God how big our mountains are, maybe we should start telling our mountains how big our God is”… think about that next time you feel like your sinking in a bed of quicksand… I serve that same God that parted the waters for Moses, I serve that same God that walked through the fire with those three Hebrew children, I serve the same God that healed that woman with the issue of blood, and I serve the same God that raised Lazarus from the dead. I serve the same God that died on a cross so that I might have a chance… I don’t think I’ve ever had a problem that My god can’t fix… but I need to make sure I go to him!!!

Just like me

O.k. I know that I had a post today, but that was more of a continuation of the day before… but I have a different thought than that on my mind today so I want to get it down so I don’t forget it.
This is a thought that was inspired by my son… He is constantly wanting to do things like me… or commenting on the fact that we look alike. And its really sweet to me… he will grab my glasses and put them on and be like, “Look Daddy I look like you!!!” or when we get our church cloths on he always wants to wear the same color of shirt as me. It makes me feel good, because it means he sees something in me that he thinks is worth mimicking… know where I’m going with this??? If we are “Christians” that means we are supposed to be Christ like. And he is our father… we are his children. I know that he is a far better example than I am, but the only way I can teach my son that is for him to see that just like he wants to be like me, I want to be like Jesus Christ. So many times we take on a life of a “Sunday Christian” and then we wonder why it is that our kids have absolutely no respect for the one who gave them life. The bible says “Train up a child in the way he should go; even when he is old he will not depart from it.” (Proverbs 22:6). Maybe we should challenge ourselves to be more spiritual and show our children that God is a very real and very important part of OUR lives… and just see if he isn’t a little more real in theirs. Think I'm crazy try it... instead of telling your kids to pray before they eat try praying with them, instead of Telling your kids to treat other people the way they would want to be treated, show them how by treating them/your spouse/ cashiers at the store/ etc. with the same respect you would like to be treated with. Sometimes I feel that one of the biggest failures in our society is that we've become a society that doesn't lead by example... maybe we should start.

The Consultation

As Promised here goes….
Day 1:
I went in for a informational session… found out that this Group has a certificate of excellence, and have never lost a patient on the table… the surgeon also teaches the procedure in America and across sea’s… so ultimately I am going to the best (which is what I want if I am going to be putting my life in his hands… I also found out that there are three different surgeries… but they will evaluate me and figure out which one is best for me…. Post op what I would expect is a stomach about the size of an egg, to eat 4-6 small meals a day, and a commitment to stay away from certain foods and pop the rest of my life while taking vitamins to balance out the malabsorbtion (my body isn’t going to get all the nutrients from the food)… all of this is if the Group see’s me as a qualifying candidate and if my insurance will cover it… which they should but they might have things they want me to do first.
Day 2:
I had to feel out this huge physiological evaluation to make sure I didn’t have underlying issues (will come to that later) and feel out “quiz” sheet to see if I was paying attention the day before and read my stuff. I then went into a room where I was first met by a Medical examiner and he asked me “Physical” questions about family heart disease and stuff, and if I felt pain you know sort of like a physical. When he left a dietitian came in. and she went over my knowledge of protein foods and carb foods… went over the quiz with me (I got them all right woohoo) we talked about my past of yoyo dieting where I’m at… o.k. here as a side note I would like to add… they kept saying “when did you start having a weight problem” to which I said “I don’t know I was always chubby after like fourth grade but then when I was fifteen I lost a hundred pounds and stayed close to there for two years but I would say I have faught it since fourth grade” just in case you were wondering. Then when she left the psychologist came in. and she talked to me about the underlying issues like do I have thought of suicide and was there events in my past that I blame my weight on… It was kind of cool and I told her so (I’ve always wanted to talk to a shrink)… after she talked to me she said the only two things she really recommended that I address on her part is maybe joining a support group which has people that have had the surgery as well as people that are about to have it (a group of people with a shared interest) and that I read a book called “thoughtful eating” because apparently I’m not a binge eater I am a thoughtless eater… which means… basically I’m a heavy grazer… I don’t think about what I’m eating it’s just there so I grab some.
And there you have it, sorry if I bored you...

The Meetings

O.K. So I said that I wanted to get on the Blog so it didn’t go to the weigh side… and then I didn’t blog for a Couple days… Let me explain. I have been torn about how many people I wanted to know about this for a while, but since steps are definitely being taken in that direction I figure now is a good point to start opening up about it a little more. So here it goes… Monday we traveled and then Tuesday and Wednesday I was at the University of Chicago Medical Center for a weight loss surgery consultation. This is not something I go into lightly Something has to be done and I can’t/don’t do it on my own… here are issues that my weight is causing with me… I take Medicine for Hypertension (high blood pressure), Cholesteral, And type 2 Diabetes… it is getting harder and harder for my doctor to control my diabetes with medicine… and the combination of the higher sugar levels and the high cholesterol means (as my doctor puts it) If I were to have a stroke or heart attack it would be sad but not suprising. I told you all that to let you know this isn’t something that is being done for vanity… it is for necessity… I want to one day hold my grandson/granddaughter and if things continue the way they are I don’t even know if I’ll see my son in high school… I don’t want that. And I know from previous experience that yoyo dieting might be a patch for me… but I need a tool that is more permanent… My Body is something that I need to take care of for myself, for my family, and for God. I am not doing anyone right by being this large… I will try to post more about what “went on” the last couple days tomorrow… but for today I need to get some stuff done, so I have to go.

When Time is no more

This is my thought for today... I'm not much of a writer, buts it's what I felt

When Time is No More

When time is no more, and I face my fate;
Will I make it through, that pearly white gate?
Will I hear these words, in that sweet moment;
“Enter thou in, good and faithful servant”
And then with a garment, whiter than snow;
Will I see a place, this world can not know.

Or will there be fear, when these words are brought;
“Depart from me sinner, I know thee not”?
Will I regret, the chances not taken?
Time is no more, Eternity wakens.
This scene is so far, from heavens glory;
Fire and brimstone; not just a story.

Please help me take heed, to salvations plan
Provide me the strength, of a righteous man
Let me remember, the ways of my god;
As through this dark world, each day I do trod.
Help me know your ways, when I am enticed
So one day I’ll rest, with you Jesus Christ.

Coming Home

When I went to my Great Uncles funeral they taught about the Prodigal Son and I have been thinking about it ever since. If you don’t know who that is you can read about him in your bible (Luke 15:11-32). The gist of the story is I young man asks his father for his inheritance and then goes and blows it all… only to realize that once he had wasted everything his father had given to him he had nothing… and ended up eating with the swine (pigs) which to the Jewish people was a dirty animal… so its safe to say that he was in the lowest place he could be in…. but one day he realized that his fathers servants lived a better life than he was living so he decided to go back home… and ask his father to let him be as a servant… he came back to his father who ran to him… and accepted him back not as a servant but as a son… and his father says something later on when the young man’s brother is upset that his dad is throwing this big celebration for the son that wasted his inheritance. He says “It was meet that we should make merry, and be glad: for this thy brother was dead, and is alive again; and was lost, and is found.
Sometimes I am so full of appreciation for God accepting me back into his arms that I feel like I need to share it… so bear with me… you see I left God thinking I had made mistakes that God would never see past, that I was so soiled that I deserved nothing better than to eat with the swine… and truth be told that was true.. But that isn’t how God saw it, just like that Prodigal son when I hit the point where I knew that the only way for me to have any peace within myself was to come back, to accept whatever my father would give me. And to know that what he had to offer was better than what I could do for myself, for me to desire the life he had for me… that’s when I came back… I always liked that story, because it gave me hope that “when I was ready” he would be there… now I love that story because it tells me something else… you see that son left the ways of his father… He went out into the world and without having a direct link to his father ended up with nothing… when he came to his senses he came back to his father… he came back to his fathers house… he came back to the life that his father had for him… he didn’t stay out there… just like me when I came back… I had to pick up the life my father had for me… I had to leave all those other things behind, all those things I had picked up when I was living a life in the world…. I had to see for myself that what God could give me was more important than what I could ever do for myself…. There is a scripture (James 4:8) that says “Draw nigh to God, and he will draw nigh to you. Cleanse your hands, ye sinners; and purify your hearts, ye double minded.” If we want to get closer to God we have to draw closer to him. Think about it… he hasn’t changed… the only way to get closer to something that doesn’t move is for you to start moving closer.
If you keep doing what you’ve always done, you’ll keep getting what you’ve always gotten.

Cherish the moment

I’m sitting here thinking about what I should write about today (because I’m afraid if I pause it will get lost in the shuffle) so anyway, I’m looking back over the Days events… and I think about the Election… we’re going to have a new president (interesting)… I think about Gas Prices… I saw them for 2.09 this morning (awesome)… but for some reason the thing pressing my mind is something that seems frivolous compared to all that… you see this weekend I am going to have some of my cousins over… and that’s what’s exciting to me… it might seem crazy but they remind me of good times. I wouldn't trade anything for my life now, I feel like I am finally where I should be with God or at least on my way there (no one is perfect) I love my wife and Son… all in all I am happy… but when I’m with my cousins it makes me think of a different time… in a lot of ways it makes me think of my grandparents house… we used to go over there for the holidays and we would all sit in the “middle room” close to the coal stove and talk… because all the men were in the living room and all the women were in the kitchen… then later we made it to the kitchen table… sitting around picking at the turkey and dressing, eating grandma’s cheese spread (that I still can’t get just right) and visiting… laughing… just enjoying each other… Grandma and Grandpa always had stories to tell about when they were younger, or when our parents were younger… I loved listening to those stories… Grandpa was hilarious, he would tell stories and then start cracking up at it… I loved him so much; I miss him more than I could ever say. But anyway when I’m with my cousins, even though we are all different people than we used to be, we still end up sitting around the table talking, and inevitably we start talking about something from when we were young and crazy… I hope that our kids can have a little piece of that… knowing that there is a bond that family has a connection that ties you together. So anyway I guess if I had a thought that I wanted anyone reading this to walk away with it would be this… if you haven’t talked to your Grandparents, Parents, Brothers, Sisters, Cousins… recently, please don’t let it go to long… because one day they won’t be there, and you don’t want to be left wishing that you would have spent just a little more time with them.

Out of Control!!!!

So I am going to have a slight rant right now… Yesterday on my way home I got behind this SUV/crossover (not sure which) that on the back window had this HUGE sign of that kid that is always peeing on stuff accept this time he was flipping me off and around him it said “get off my rear” (of course it didn’t use the word rear)…. O.k. here is my problem how is it that If I were to have a bumper sticker that said something like “get right or get left”… that would be horrible because I might make somebody feel a little bit of conviction for the way they live… but society thinks its o.k. for this sophomoric person to put that on the back of their vehicle for the whole world to see!!!!! Should I have taken there license plate down, so when my son goes to school and flips the Teacher off (because the cool cartoon character on the vehicle in front of us did it), I can tell them to not get my son in trouble but to give that driver a detention… of course not, because I am bringing up my son to not go according to other people’s actions… but to live according to what is right. It just seems ridiculous to me that we live in a culture where people trying to serve God are supposed to just accept the ways of the world or be viewed as haters, judgmental or worse… yet we are constantly being told that what we are doing is wrong, or we are extremist, or legalistic!!!! The radio station I listen to has a “morning nugget” every day and this is what yesterdays said “The more I let free will steer me away from purity, the more my life goes out of control” this country is getting out of control… ironically this country seems to try to push God out of everything they can… maybe if they would allow a little bit of purity in this country we would be able to have a little more Morality.

The Price of Gold

Tomorrow’s the Big Vote Day!!!!! I’ve never actually voted before, but this year I feel inspired! I won’t go into how I feel about this candidate or that one, because if I have heard lies about them I don’t want to one day have to answer for bearing false witness. Politics are not worth losing heaven. Its truly amazing what people are willing to give their salvation up for… if you think about it… the wealthy land owner asked Jesus Christ what he could do, but when God told him to sell all he had he walked away sad… but he still walked away!!!! I am not a wealthy person (by this worlds standards), so Money has never really become my idol… but that doesn’t mean that God hasn’t asked me to give something up… and I have had to choose between it and him… I always try to remind myself that at the end of the day… that “thing” that I hold so valuable that I am having to choose between it and the living God… is going to be gone. And I don’t want to pay an eternity of Hell for something just because I made it my God (because if you are placing it above God in your life it is your God) I only have room in my life for one God and that is Jesus Christ. And I pray daily that I always have the strength and desire to keep him above all in my life.

the value of a life

Life is a gift that we shouldn’t take lightly… We will be putting my great uncle to rest today, and it really makes me think. You see, we are each given a brief time on this earth and what we do with that time is up to us. My Grandmother (his sister) came up to me at the viewing and said the only thing he left behind was a name sake… which happens to be my son and happened more by chance then anything else. When my wife and I found out we were having a son five years ago we found a name we liked, and then found out that my grandma had a brother with that name (no its not a common name)…. But anyway it seems sad to live this life in a way that at the end of the day you have nothing. I’m not talking about monetary things either… to me if you leave behind a Child that actually has morals in today’s society then you’ve left something of great value behind… if you have let God use you to touch someone and possibly save a soul, you’ve left something behind…. But if you are living your life “in the moment” not caring about your future (both in this world and beyond)… then take heed… find God… Read your bible… Grow as a person… there is so much that we can do in this life… but we have to be willing to do it!!!! I have always been fascinated with my Grandmothers (and now my wife’s Grandmothers) when they make quilts… they put it all together one peace at a time… and when its all said and done there is a Quilt where everything works together… while they are doing there “one piece at a time” they are pushing toward a mark… and when its done.. they have this quilt… the thing is… if you look at a quilt… on the bottom side there is a backing which Is one solid piece of material… and all of the little pieces fit within its parameter… that’s how our lives should fit with in god’s parameters… and just imagine what kind of life he can make for us at the end of the day… (So much better than random pieces left in a pile on the floor!!!)

My Blog

I really have know idea what I’m going to blog about, I guess things that mean something to me, so you will probably hear about God, My wife, Son, Family, Weight, views in general… not sure where this is going to go but figure its worth a try… if you don’t like it that’s o.k. its more a place for me to put my thoughts than anything else….